Moving to San Diego was a fun adventure, but August and the first part of September were rough. It took me all of August to find a job, finally I was hired on at Kohls, I was cross trained within the month which is good, hopefully that will result in more hours. On a much better note, we are all settled in and enjoying San Diego as much as we can. Every weekend we make a point to do some type of adventure, whether its the beach, dog beach, Balboa park (we have year round passes to the zoo,sea world,and wild animal park!!) ... Its always something fun! My favorite so far is the beach and sea world :)
My birthday was fantastic, we went to the Zoo for the first time, then to Mission beach! We played for the whole evening and watched the sunset. Ginny gave me a Chargers jersey :) and a new binder! I had a binder back in '07, and I honestly don't really know why I tossed it, I got to a point where I thought I didn't 'need' it. I lost some weight and just wore a little bigger shirts so you couldn't see my chest. I hated clothing being tight on me and touching me, and well a binder does all that and more lol I had a rough time in '07 accepting myself in a various of ways. But now in '10 I'm pretty happy with myself! I do wear the binder to work, it makes me feel more comfortable. Now I can wear shirts my size and I think I look/dress much better. My jeans aren't falling off of me, in fact I wear a belt and my back pockets are on my butt! haha but seriously the more confident and comfortable I become with myself the more I feel at ease with dressing the way I like.
Speaking of binders, I love mine yet I'm scared of it. Wearing a binder consistently can cause a lot of damage to a body. I've seen some guys who wear their binder everyday all day long, and the end results leave them with deformed ribs. Granted it's like everything else, too much of anything is bad for you, but binders really do restrict breathing to a point. I can tell when I'm really busy at work and running around trying to get everything done, at the end of the night my chest it tight, and when I get home and take it off I'm a little sore. I really try to restrict my self to only wearing it for a few hours, and try even harder to never wear it more than 8 hours, however a couple weeks ago I got caught up in my day and ended up staying late at work so I didn't get the chance to take it off, I wore it for almost 12 hours. I was SO sore!! Actually it scared me at how sore I was, I made myself not put my binder on despite needing to go to work for a few days until ALL the sore-ness was gone. I've learned and plan ahead, if I think I may get stuck somewhere and not be able to get home to take it off, I take a backpack with a extra shirt I feel more comfortable wearing with out a binder. Wearing a binder has it's pros and cons, but I like the pros, and I'm being careful to avoid the cons.
I've decided I'm really going to get my butt in gear and work out! This isn't a weight loss thing by any means, I want muscle definition. I'm really starting to eat so much more healthier, and by adding some healthy exercise, I'll be at my goal in no time! When I work out, I lose some of my chest and that makes me happy. I also gain muscle definition in my arms and stomach, and that also makes me happy. I will never be perfect, there's no such thing. I actually heard a great saying once that made me laugh and think it was so on point;
...Because by striving to be perfect, we just might reach half-ass! If we only go for just good enough, we wont even get to half-ass! ... and to die like that, my dear friends, would be worse than licking a salty substance off some large mammals testiclesYou may laugh but it really has a point! And since I don't want to die like that, I'm going to strive to be as perfect as I can be :)
Well that's all the excited news for now, I will be much better about posting more then a quarterly update. lol
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